Humor first time stories

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Tut

humor Taggerdoo 2018-11-22

Most people in these parts work for Ammon Abrams, or someone he contracts with, or who provides services to him or one of his businesses. Andrews asked, "What was Mr. Abrams like as a boy in school? "There was a mid-summer party at the Metzler estate, and the guess list most emphatically did not include yours truly or Ammon Abrams. I paused, took a deep breath and asked "Did I mention to you that Ammon Abrams happens to be hung like a Shetland pony?" He saw Ammon slip inside the house and in a little bit he heard Em squalling like two cats fighting and she was both of them. "Ammon told me later that Em wasn't a virgin, big surprise, but she'd never had a cock like his.

Mr. Spanky Goes to Heaven

humor badboy909 2018-11-21

I knew Karen would never have anything to do with a guy like me unless she got to know me first. But I could be a perfect gentleman and a real sweetheart, especially when it came to succulent lips and big boobs and a hot ass like Karen's. If the way to Karen's heart, and other parts of her anatomy, was through taking her nerdy little sister to church, well, Hallelujah! Maybe because she was always dressed like a little old maid. "I know you like Karen," she told me, hitting the peppermint again. "I suck cock," she whispered in my ear, kissed me a little harder, then whispered in my other ear, "for the right guy, I might cornhole."

Oh Christmas Goat, Oh Christmas Goat

humor sprite 2018-11-17

Christmas Day. Shelly was in the driver’s seat, her bunny slipper on the pedal, steering wheel in one hand while she searched through the stations of the radio for something that wasn’t Celine Dion singing Come All Ye Faithful. While there wasn’t snow on the ground, the dirt felt like ice against my bare feet as I headed for the hot springs that Shelly had pointed out upon our arrival. I felt her hands upon my head, stroking, fingers sneaking through my hair, tensing at times, then relaxing as I began to lick her wet pussy, my tongue gliding between puffy lips.

First Time With Sherry

humor David929 2018-11-17

I laughed it off, but did mention it to Sherry in my next note, adding that a former co-worker did spank me and that I was a bit scared when she said that she had forgot her paddle. Upon my next trip to the store, I snuck a note to her, which included my address and phone number, letting her know that anytime she needed a good laugh, she was more than welcome to stop over. "I said "Thank you, mommy." You swatted me on my bare ass and that's what a mommy does to her naughty boy, right?" I gave her cute ass a gentle pat over her jeans, as well, causing her to blush. The idea of stopping by her place did interest me and who knows what sort of naughty fun we could get into.

First Time Disaster

humor oz99 2018-11-15

Alice studied Jason's beautiful seven inch manhood and then with the alcohol taking its effect on her also, she clumsily thought, he'll never know the difference and she tried to delicately run her fingers over his exposed prick. His tongue left a moist trail from her nipple through the valley of her belly button and lower as Jason turned his body so Alice could continue her attention to his prick that was leaking precum and he got his first experience at muff diving. About three days after getting laid, while avoiding Alice every time he could at the office, Jason noticed a sharp pain in his cock every time he took a piss.

A Laundry List, and Other Sins: A Porn Parody

humor oceanrunner 2018-11-04

Her lips were large and pouty, and whenever men saw her for the first time, they usually imagined her dick-sucking lips wrapped around their hard, throbbing cocks until they could empty into her slutty mouth and pretty face. When he pressed his big dick against her asshole, it hurt for only a second before his cock, which was all wet from her cream and his spunk, slid all the way into her virgin ass. Even though his name was Little Dick, he was even bigger than his dad, and when he pulled his cock out of his shorts, Flora knew it was going to be a good afternoon.

The Wham Bam Theory

humor Master_Jonathan 2018-11-03

But unlike Andrew, who would be perfectly content to spend the rest of his life with the only person he felt he could feel comfortable with - himself - Elizabeth very much wanted to find someone she could call her own. They finished eating their meals and as Andrew got up to head back to his lab, he paused for a moment to look at the girl who had been sitting at his table. Andrew got to the point where he actually held conversation with Elizabeth and she began looking forward to lunch with what she considered her beau. Andrew took a small step backwards and as their eyes locked onto one another, he began slowly, cautiously, to slip the straps of her dress off her shoulders one at a time.

Cuntlet

humor Conversations 2018-09-23

[An eighteen-year-old me with a cuntlet would be a stretch, if you know what I mean! With a guy as big as you, I like to take in just the head of your prick to start with, just until the ridge plops into my vagina. And now that your shaft is wet with my saliva, I'm going to slide your prick back into my cunt like these two fingers and sit all the way down on you... With your prick buried deep inside me and your knuckle against my asshole, there's only one more thing I need: I'm going to rub my clit and imagine looking into your eyes as we climb Mount Ecstasy together.]

My First Time

humor jabig6 2018-07-30

And I'll never forget Without a single regret. The sky was dark The moon was high Her hair was soft Her eyes were blue I knew just what She wanted to do. Her skin so soft Her legs so fine I ran my fingers Down her spine. I didn't know how But I tried my best I started by placing My hands on her breast. I remember my fear My fast beating heart But slowly she spread Her legs apart. I felt no shame The white stuff came.. At last it's finished My first time ever My first time ever My first time ever At milking a cow...

Learning by Doing It

humor SamScribble 2018-07-09

I don't think that books are my preferred learning style. And right then and there, Fiona made a sound like someone enjoying a particularly nice mouthful of food. And 'Oh, yes' was what Fiona said too - in between mouthfuls of my cock. Mind you, I also had to be careful not to think too much about her beautiful, warm, luscious cunt, with its slick valley and soft, fleshy sides, and the tiny hard cock at one end and the warm mine shaft-like vagina at the other. I think we've just about got that bit sussed,' Fiona said. 'Look, why don't we take a bit of a break,' Fiona said, 'and then, if you're feeling up for it, we can have a go at a full-on fuck.

Our Little Experiment

humor Moosifer 2018-05-23

"You know, it's going to be really hard to take any of this seriously when you keep giggling and wiggling like that," Lenn mused aloud, standing over the bed. Most chores didn't grant him a full look at Terran's nude body displayed so lewdly on the bed like that. Lenn climbed in the bed tentatively, looking over his lover's attractive body and wishing they could just rub all up against each other the normal way. I'm not going to slap you!" Indignant, Lenn took his hands from Terran's body and sat on his feet with a huff. Terran reached his arms out to wrap around his lover and Lenn was more than happy to fall into his embrace.