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The Tongue Stimulator

humor benawriter 2018-12-03

He had always been able to satisfy his European girlfriend, Yora, when she wanted oral sex from him, but recently she attended a face sitting class with a friend and now seemed obsessed with it. “Your girlfriend likes oral sex from you but your tongue cannot last as long as she needs for complete satisfaction, am I right?” “You mean a pill can make my tongue hard for a long time?” he asked. Riley recalled the receptionist who signed him in, sitting behind the desk and flashing her legs by crossing them several times as he filled out the forms. She entertained herself on his face for almost thirty minutes and Riley was pleased that it was not uncomfortable to service her because she did all the work, attaining orgasm simply by using his stiff tongue.

There Is Nothing To Be seen

humor Adagio 2018-12-03

Next to laying my penis on top of the liverwurst, topped by the bread and jacking off with it, there ain't nothing better then with wax paper. It had been several weeks ago, while visiting a local nursery, I happen to run into Dionaea (Dione) Muscipula, my now new girl friend. Although looking for blue fescue seeds for the home terrace I was immediately smitten by her. Hurley (my best friend) was a medical school drop out in 1947 and now was Assistant Manager of Last Resort Car wash and was always featured as geriatric chamois and passenger side of the month employee. I thought it time for Hurley to look at her, seeing as he did have some medical schooling.


The Secret Life of Bellingham Sam

humor magnificent1rascal 2018-12-02

She was still wearing the gorgeous camisole when he began massaging her shoulders, but soon sat forward a few inches and lifted her arms in a silent signal that it was time for the garment to come off, and Sam happily removed both it and his tee shirt. He could tell she was getting close to orgasm, and was grateful because he also knew he couldn’t last much longer; the taunting her fingers were performing on him, coupled with the fantasy that had enabled him to while away the time during the slow drive home, had him primed to shoot his load like a horny 16-year-old, but he dutifully held out for her signal.

A bored housewife's amusing tale

humor Mysteria27 2018-12-02

A few of the men had suggested to Tracy that since she gave incredible cyber-sex, maybe she should start to write erotic stories. Tracy slipped her finger into her bald pussy and began to fuck herself. Tracy then typed back to her friend that her pussy was so wet. Just as Tracy was about to orgasm her Hitachi Magic Wand started to spark and caught on fire. Tracy was a very wet girl and she always seemed to short out the damn vibrators. Tracy was going to be getting her Hitachi wand tomorrow from Amazon, but still wanted something for her orgasm today. Tracy started to notice all these men coming into the store and going to a back room.

Over The Pill

humor Adagio 2018-12-02

I told the desk clerk, a mild-mannered goober, "I think I have influenza." "I want you to plummet me in my orifice like you did the night of our bunnyswoon. The last straw was when she asked me to sling her some phlegm, and I told her I was going to call the front desk, inquiring a mademoiselle. "I can't satisfy four whores, and the room air conditioner is working great." "Zelda is down at the lounge, straying her ass now." The clerk then told Hurley that he had just recently shellacked it with enamel and tinted the glass. When Zelda returned from straying her ass, she was ready for another round of whoopee making.

My Recurring Lush Nightmare

humor FirstBlush 2018-11-30

"Chris!" With that exuberant syllable I drop the packages just inside the front door and start to rush toward my adorable boyfriend who isn't supposed to be here until tomorrow, but something in his face freeze-frames me like Roadrunner over its ersatz Latin caption. But when in deep anything, keep your mouth shut, so I say not a word and let him spin me in an exaggerated twirl before he pulls me assertively into his arms. "I knew this guy who sent the same set of dirty instructions to all his friends and it pissed me off and I sassed him in schoolgirl character and two stories came out of it." I need to shut up, and fast.

Incubi Lover

humor Taggerdoo 2018-11-30

I actually did agree with the old monster, so I nodded and replied, "Yes, that is so true, but I'm sure you have your sources." I wasn't about to reveal that I'd twigged onto a cache of goodies owned by the late Pol Pot. "Good boy!" Scorn roared, a smile beaming across his lovely mouth. Scorn smiled and said "That's just a little bonus, from me to you Mendel. She said "Don't come back, Mendel." I thought that was an excellent bit of advice and I planned to take it deeply into my cold dead beating heart. I in turn rubbed her tiny breasts and the nipples exploded into hard little nubs, like acorns under her rough shift.

The Gift That Keeps On Giving

humor L8LastNight 2018-11-30

“You really slipped a hell of a lot of rum in Kara’s nog,” Allyson whispered, leaning in close to Tru on the sofa. The two of them, along with Fatema and Peri who were seated on the rug, watched as Kara stumbled around the room, semi-delirious. Fatema flashed a scolding frown toward Tru. She said to Kara, “Dinner was amazing! Allyson was about to set aside her present when Kara said, “You have to wear it, Al.” Fatema and Peri gawked and giggled as Tru and Allyson both grabbed hold of the giant dildo and spread their lips around it like two ends of a jumbo dog. Ten minutes later, Kara slumped in her chair, oven mitts over her face and the offending thick, black dildo still in her hand.

I Vont Yu Beef Curtains

humor Adagio 2018-11-30

It was show time, the lights dimmed and Honeysuckle came to the stage. Dancing slowly and very seductively starting to strip. Her busts threatening to burst out. She unbuttoned the front of her dress. She played with her pussy lips and they fluttered a cheer to the chairs. The customers were throwing cash and bottle caps on the stage. Between the darken streets and 12 steps shadowed from the sun, the life of a vampire is always on the run. Wafting like legs, with a creeping personality and putrefaction of vampire ambrosia. The night played out as I hungered between her thighs, and she scratched her initials on my back, before the moon expired. The confessional box reeking of sex and blood on the apse.

Shadow's Ivy

humor Adagio 2018-11-28

Like other members of the family flock, I attended Dartmouth University, majoring in mediocrity and minoring in meteorology, following in my uncle's footsteps, chasing tornadoes and aspiring stage dancers... In spite of my freaking insomnia, I rendered my pen to writing erotica and, at the same time, practised new knots on green ivy while practising self restraint bondage. Lost in the bushes of the maze, he would many times have to send up smoke signals, like the heathens of the swamps, for assistance. As small particles of light came in from around the creases of the closed window, creating shadows on the walls as she mimed that of a horny large bird seeking worms to feed her diet of the moment, penises in a row of all different sizes and communions.

Peek-a-Boo, I-See-You

humor Green_Man 2018-11-28

As I walked towards the coffee shop, I felt the breeze blowing up my short, flimsy skirt, feeling pert, all alert. Then I slowly started spreading my legs to give him and him alone a good shot of my sweet cunny with its triangle of blond hair, so fair and rare. I looked over and was startled to see he had wrapped a hand around his cock, protruding from his shorts, and was jerking off as I diddled my cunny. I was fucking my fingers into my pussy and he was jacking his hard cock. There I poured my coffee into his cup and slowly savored the life sustaining taste of man cum.

I Vont Yu Gummy Bear

humor Adagio 2018-11-28

The Vampire ladies having a wake sale of stale tomato aspic (a placebo for blood) to fatten the meager cougher's of the coven. She grasped my cock and bestowed on it a slippery kiss, as I eased on down to her cunt. "Have you ever tried eating pussy, wearing a crash helmet and magnifying goggles with a snorkel?" I was at a disadvantage, with the doctor's safety accouterments, but I gave my cock a good showing. Pecan being my weakness. Silently, in my bestest vampire canter, I eased up to the window. She was sitting in a hair salon chair, paging through a horoscope and dinosaur magazine. Making me home sick, with memories of the invention of the square wheel.

Lean Acres And Harpoons

humor Adagio 2018-11-26

Like most schools, there was a rumor going around, that Cilla Derk had fucked our high school basketball team a couple months past. He moved in front of me and stood on the commode sink. His dick was now level with my face and it wasn't a far reach for my lips to kiss his little joust of a cock. "Lets all gather in a circle and unite this couple in matrimony," Saying with a straight face, the guru performed a civil ceremony on Cilla and I. Fucking her ass with my snout she shouted, "hallelujah." Then Barkley (Adonis) moved close to me and started sucking my cock. It may sound a difficult feat, but she was ass fucking Cilla with a nipple.

Dante Abbracciavento PI: Find the man with the buckles on his shoes - Pt 3

humor gilrenard 2018-11-25

Marie looked at Viv and winked as she coyly asked, "Welcome to Little Italy, Dante's Girl. While Marie and Viv were laughing it up, I arrived at the furniture factory that Uri runs his operation out of. I had called Uri and told him that eight in the morning didn’t work for me. I caught her fucking Chang, and threatened to tell dad unless I got something I wanted,” Ling answered. Marie called Viv and laughed as she said to her, "Viv, you're gonna want to come down and watch the G and D drama queen show." Sometimes I think they're both not right in the head." She turned to Marie and said, "Marie, tell Viv how my Gino proposed to you."

Sayonara Elysian Fields, Hello Hortense

humor Adagio 2018-11-25

At first with a back and forth motion as if wipers on a windshield of a Kai, then like a baton of an out-of-sorts maestro...striking Zelda's face and knocking the Tammy Faye's from her eyes. To top it off, the damn box inserted up my ass started playing music off key and love birds flew in the open window and lit on the handle...pecking at my ass. Zelda was a little bruised and told me that a saxophone wasn't needed for group thinking that the singing birds was enough. Kissed my girlfriend's asp...I hate snakes, and drove to Hortense, Georgia thirty-five miles from Brunswick, wanting to apply at the only croquette and mallard shop in Dixie. Hosel drilling a mallard was an art. Once there, I rented an old train caboose with one bedroom after being told the hotel position had been filled at the croquette shop.


It Don't Rain In Arizona

humor Adagio 2018-11-24

The two rooms were small but adequate, and my landlady, Mrs. Quagmire, seemed nice and pleasant, having the scent of cinnamon bread. Leaning forward, naked in a kitchen chair, his belly fat hung down between his legs and he was having a difficult time attempting to put a cock ring on his penis. Then, came a knocking on my door from Mrs. Quagmire. Having to give 2percentcream a rain check (it seldom rains in Arizona), I ate them as I heard the Indian crank over. Once again, a knocking came at my door as the old broad said, "it's a parakeet, Taffy."  Behind his chair, he had his Harley parked in the kitchen, and Mrs. Quagmire was polishing his handle bars.

Gravel In My Gurdy

humor Adagio 2018-11-22

I left off as Hurley and Zelda were moped-bopping. I pulled the BMW R16 moto-cycle with sidecar into the lot of the Boll-Weevil Motel. Finally getting settled in the room, Zelda was taking a shower. He took a peek and watched Zelda and the housemaid wilding away in April Showers bath salts. She must have entered the room when he was squinting. Zelda's clit was hung up in the faucet and the maids tits were floating like water wings. The maid did hip service as she donned a robe and left as Zelda came out the bath wearing a shower cap. Later that night has Zelda slept I reopen the laptop to the same chat room.


humor Taggerdoo 2018-11-22

Most people in these parts work for Ammon Abrams, or someone he contracts with, or who provides services to him or one of his businesses. Andrews asked, "What was Mr. Abrams like as a boy in school? "There was a mid-summer party at the Metzler estate, and the guess list most emphatically did not include yours truly or Ammon Abrams. I paused, took a deep breath and asked "Did I mention to you that Ammon Abrams happens to be hung like a Shetland pony?" He saw Ammon slip inside the house and in a little bit he heard Em squalling like two cats fighting and she was both of them. "Ammon told me later that Em wasn't a virgin, big surprise, but she'd never had a cock like his.

Willacoochee Chicken

humor Adagio 2018-11-22

In Hortense I saw a clue of what I wanted to do, wearing my thinking hat askew, helping Zelda cap her prized red 'mentos with okra. Her pickle eggs didn't do so well at the county fair, seeing as Gerdie our laying hen refused to get laid...Zelda used golf balls and broke three judges teeth. That night jacking off with calf's liver rolled up in a comic book...waking up with assorted colors of ink covering up my skunk tattoo...but I could pull picture hangers from the wall with my hammer. Zelda with an ambidextrous clit can hit with both sides of her clitoris, but is a southpaw when catching in the mitt with her 'mento and tossing the pecan back.


Dream Job (Everyman's Fantasy)

humor DirtyMartini 2018-11-21

"I think students should be taught real life skills," said the woman in a determined voice, "Like oral sex." "Yes, Mr. Chairman," said Miss Dover quietly. "Mr. Chairman," said Miss Dover in a quiet deliberate tone, "I have done some research and asked people who I acknowledge to be experts in the field and they all tell me the same thing." "Actually, you will be teaching oral sex to high school seniors at a prestigious all-girls’ school in Southern California," she said as she leaned over and touched my arm. For a moment there is sounded like you said I will be teaching oral sex at an all-girls school in Southern California." I was surprised I got those words out.

Chill Pill

humor ClarkRoberts 2018-11-19

I said, “You can’t go out there like that, maybe if I suck your cock it will go down.” Looking up at Myron, I said, “Myron, you’re fucking huge.” I kissed the tip of his monster then smiled up at him and said huskily, "You have very beautiful cock, Myron." Looking at Myron’s still swollen cock, I said, “Looks like that blowjob wasn’t fantastic enough.” Using the flood of my excitement, Myron worked the rest of his enormously long and extremely hard cock inside me, finally bottoming out against my cervix. Slowly, Myron withdrew his cock until just the head remained inside my pussy. Later, as my team celebrated our success with Champaign, Roland asked, “So Boss, what was the deal with Myron?”

SilkPanties22 (Fourth Stab)

humor DirtyMartini 2018-11-18

Though I rarely logged onto the site during working hours, I often thought about it. One day during a chat, a girl told me of an online encounter she had with another woman. She told me she had cybersex with another woman and she found it very arousing because it had been a long time fantasy to be with another girl. Though the possibility of me observing two girls cybering seemed like just a dream, it was a fantasy I could not get out of my mind. The next day at work I logged on to the site early. "I am getting horny just thinking about meeting a new girl." She wrote on the screen.

Asphalt And Fescue

humor Adagio 2018-11-18

Then, she graduated to making porn films at the Michigan Raceway, during a pit stop, as the crowd was singing 'The Devil Went Down To Georgia.' In the opening scene, she was hunching a wheel-jack and giving head to the guy scraping bugs off the air-intake of a racing machine. Two wooden Indians that may have been her idea of gargoyles stood at each end of the trailer, looking down on me. Her nipples, pierced with green plastic safety pins, looked like cracked walnuts peeking from beneath shorts. She explained to me that she has lost her hearing, and I immediately looked down to assist her in finding her earring, remembering that she was illiterate, and never got past the third grade, like I did. Popping her chewing gum, Bobby Jo took my hand, her saddlebag ass jostling from beneath her Daisy Dukes.

First Time With Sherry

humor David929 2018-11-17

I laughed it off, but did mention it to Sherry in my next note, adding that a former co-worker did spank me and that I was a bit scared when she said that she had forgot her paddle. Upon my next trip to the store, I snuck a note to her, which included my address and phone number, letting her know that anytime she needed a good laugh, she was more than welcome to stop over. "I said "Thank you, mommy." You swatted me on my bare ass and that's what a mommy does to her naughty boy, right?" I gave her cute ass a gentle pat over her jeans, as well, causing her to blush. The idea of stopping by her place did interest me and who knows what sort of naughty fun we could get into.